Dating after relationship break up
Just because it’s theoretically possible doesn’t mean that it’s going to happen to you, and betting the farm that you’re the exception is a very good way to end up without a farm.
The fact of the matter is, even with the most amicable splits, you’re going to need time to mourn, to heal and adjust.
This isn’t a rhetorical question; it’s a legitimate issues that you’re going to have to address sooner rather than later.
In an ideal world, it would never be an issue, but there will always be people who rudely ignore the implied social contract that says that upon breaking up with us, our exes are obligated to live monastic existences far from anything remotely sexual.
That being said, there’s not being comfortable with your ex’s new relationships and using your “discomfort” to control their behavior.
There’re plenty of toxic individuals who’ll try to leverage their feelings in order to keep manipulating an ex.
Good fences make for good neighbors and good boundaries make for good friends; establishing early on what you both are and aren’t comfortable with is part of how you make a friendship with your ex work.
It’s to not be comfortable getting the full details of what your ex is getting up to; being uncomfortable with knowing about their sex life doesn’t make you less of a friend, nor does it mean you’re not over them.
You need to have time apart, without being in contact with each other, in order to move into this new phase of your life.
Your relationship has just ended and that deserves to be observed.
While breaking up certainly doesn’t mean your relationship was a failure, you are facing an ending and those tend to be sad.
When you’re just friends, however, that all changes.
You may be tight with one another, but you don’t have the same kind of relationship that you did before.