Dating sercond friendsip
After two years of using Tinder, off and on, last weekend I deleted the app.I had been visiting a friend in Sweden, and took it pretty badly when a Tinder date invited me to a terrible nightclub, only to take a few looks at me and bolt without even bothering to fabricate an excuse.
A few weeks earlier I had tried to give my number to a girl in a cinema café in Brixton.
The date wasn’t a success in the traditional sense of leading us into a contract based on exclusivity, an accumulating cache of resentments and a mortgage, but it put me back in the game (an appropriate metaphor – people speak regularly of “playing” with the app).
According to Sean Rad, the co-founder who launched Tinder in late 2012, the service was invented for people like me.
The date hasn’t officially been set, but the reason for her imminent departure is immutable: She fell in love. After 30 — the age I’m nearing — experts find we may make casual friends, but most of us lose our best friends. How ironic that falling in one kind of love has the ability to make us lose another.
In a phone interview, psychologist and author of Andrea Bonior told me that even if you’re not married or parenting, people stop being as close to their friends because, well, they’re literally not as close anymore.