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After a few months of gym-going, I became friendly with a guy who looked like a long-lost cast member of “Jersey Shore,” with bulging muscles over every inch of his body and a tan that would put “Dancing With the Stars” contestants to shame.

Men with perfect bodies walk around the locker room in their underwear, a small towel or nothing at all, and they spend excessive amounts of time in front of the mirror oiling up before taking the “after pump” selfie.

For someone who already has body issues, the last place that I should have gone was a gym in West Hollywood.

“Maybe she could help you with your dating problems. After a 40-minute wait, she finally entered the restaurant.

I could give you her address.”I happened to be correct about her car battery, and the AAA representative replaced it at a record pace. As if my pants were on fire, I stood up and called out her name.

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